You Probably Dress Like A Douchebag, Here's Why

DO YOU DRESS LIKE A DOUCHEBAG? YES YES YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! ARE YOU WEARING STRIPES? ARE YOU IN PRISON? NO NO YES ARE THEY NO ARE THEY VERTICAL STRIPES? HORIZONTAL? ARE YOU DRESSED ENTIRELY IN DENIM? YES NO ARE YOU NO YES FAT AND TRYING YES THEY YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! NO TO CONCEAL YOUR ARE WEIGHT PROBLEM? NO YES YES ARE YOU ME? он. ARE YOU ARE YOU A FARMER? YES WELL, THAT'S WEARING DO YOU HAVE EXCUSABLE. A SKIRT? A TIME MACHINE? OBVIOUSLY NO YES NOT YES IS IT 1983? NO NO YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! ARE YOU SCOTTISH? NO YOU'RE GAY, RIGHT? ARE YOU NO NOT THAT I HAVE ANY A WOMAN? YES PROBLEM WITH THAT. YES NO ARE YOU HEY, IT'S YOUR WEARING UNDIES? IS IT THE YES OWN DAMN WEEKEND? ARE THERE BUSINESS, MAN. GOLD CHAINS NO AROUND YES YOUR NECK? AWESOME. I PITY YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! NO YES DA FOOL YOU' RE I DOUCHEBAG! YES YES NO ARE YOU ARE YOU A NO ARE YOU RAPPER? MR. T? WEARING A SWEATER VEST? YES YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! NO YES YOU GOT THAT FROM OLD NAVY IN 1997, DIDN'T YOU? NO IT DOESN'T MATTER. YOU STILL LOOK LIKE A TOOL, DUDE. OH, AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF... ARE YOU WEARING A WIFE BEATER WITH NOTHING OVER IT? YES YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! ARE YOU ELVIS AND/OR ARE YOU INTO BONDAGE? NO (AND YOU'RE PROUD OF HITTING YOUR WIFE!) YES YES NO ARE YOU WEARING AN ENSEMBLE MADE OF SUEDE OR LEATHER? YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! NO FOR A GOOD YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! TIME, GIVE ME A CALL SOMETIME NO AFTER 6PM ARE YOUR FEET INSIDE MON.- FRI. OF UGGS, CROCS, OR KNOW WHERE ANY OTHER KIND OF TO FIND SOME FOR MEN? AESTHETICALLY UNPLEASING, HARDLY FUNCTIONAL, OR EXCEEDINGLY EXPENSIVE SHOE? YES YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! YES NO YES АНА! GOTCHA HOмо! ARE YOU TEEN WOLF? ARE YOU COMPLETELY NUDE? он МY GOSH! YOU'RE ON TLC's "WHAT NOT TO WEAR!" NO YES NO YES IS YOUR COLLAR POPPED? MAYBE NO ARE YOU AT LEAST WEAR THAT ARE YOU WEARING ANY OTHER WEIRD SHIT? REALLY HAIRY? (FRENCH CHICKS HAIR WITH NO PRIDE, BROTHER. DO NOT APPLY) LET YOUR DONG YES FLAP IN THE YES BREEZE LIKE NO THERE IS NO TOMORROW. WAIT... YOU YES AREN TA HIPPIE. ARE YOU? WELL, MAYBE YOU AREN T YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! A DOUCHEBAG AFTER ALL. NO WHEW. AnADIANHONEYCOM