School Makes Me Sick!

SCHOOI MAKES ME SICKY Kids These Days An estimated 10% of school-aged children fake an illness to get out of school TRICKING THE SCHOOL NURSE 1. Be Consistent 5% - Make sure you fit at least 3 criteria for the target illness, but don't overdo it with medical terms Pair your symptoms appropriately Don't try to combine a stomach ache of children suffer from 'school phobia,' a serious form of school avoidance with an earache 2. Ride the Sick Bandwagon that causes children to really feel physically ill at the thought of attending school Cite the same symptoms as classmates or family members who have recently been sick According to the American Academy of Pediatrics 3. Respect the Nurse Licensed school nurses attend to 64% of a given student population (grades 1-12) and return Best Illness to Fake 95% of them to class Be as contagious as possible PINK EYE how to do it: Rub a small amount of red LAXATIVES lipstick and hair gel along the OLDEST TRICKS IN THE BOOK lids of one eye (not both) DIARRHEA AND GAS - Mistakes to Avoid - Admitting to more embarrassing symptoms will make your story more believable Don't overdo it: Don't fake snore or make fake vomit drimk hot water before the murse takes nyour temp. How to Don't ask the nurse to call your parents, have her suggest it to you. Fake a Ferver Don't fake an illness a burying your face in a pillow and breathing hearily will cause you to a mercury thermometer can be nurse can prove you don't have shaken to make the temperature appear look flushed higher Not Just for Kids 52% 62% 8.7% of US employees admit to falsely of employees lied because they felt of organizations payroll is a product of unscheduled calling in sick to work stressed or needed a day off absences The two most common activities for "sick" employees are watching TV or staying in bed ASSOCIATES-DEGREE-IN-NURSING.ORG Sources: http://www.wikihow.com/Fake-Sick-to-the-School-Nurse http://www.webmd.com/cold-and-flu/features/is-your-kid-sick-just-faking-it DEVELOPED BY N NOWSOURCING http://oaklandcountymoms.com/health/family-health/703-children-faking-sick http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887323478004578306510461212692.html http://www.kronos.com/pr/kronos-global-absence-survey-shows-employees-around-the-world-playing-hooky-with-china-leading-the-pack.aspx http://www.nasn.org/PolicyAdvocacy/PositionPapersandReports/NASNPositionStatementsFullView/tabid/462/Articleld/7/Caseload-Assignments-Revised-2010