Helicopter Parenting and Its Long-Lasting Effects

HELICOPTER PARENTING AND ITS LONG- LASTING EFFECTS WHAT IS A HELICOPTER PARENT? A helicopter parent has been described as any parent who 'hovers' closely over their children. This may mean being within arm's reach, even if it's against their children's own wishes, both literally and metaphorically. "THEY'RE PARENTS WHO ARE PHYSICALLY HYPER-PRESENT BUT SOMEHOW PSYCHOLOGICALLY M.I.A." The term “helicopter" for describing a parenting style was coined in 1969 when it appeared in the book Between Parent & Teenager by Dr. Haim Ginott, who notes a teen using the phrase to describe his mother. The phrase became popular in the early 2000s as baby boomers and Generation X parents began sending their children to college. College administrators noticed behaviors starting to develop such as calling to wake their children up, or complaining to professors and administrators As many as 60% of parents to young adults in college were helicopter parents in the early 2000s. about grades on their childrens' behalves. HELICOPTER PARENTING IS THOUGHT TO FOLLOW THREE PRINCIPAL PATTERNS When we do for our kids what they can already do for themselves. When we do for our kids what 2 they can almost do for themselves. When our parenting 3 behavior is motivated by our own egos. HELICOPTER PARENTING IS THOUGHT TO BE ON THE RISE. Studies show that kids who walked or biked themselves to school dropped from 48% TO 13% BETWEEN 1969 AND 2009. This was NOT accompanied by an increase in general danger to children. Self-reported helicopter parenting is found most commonly in the NORTHEAST of the U.S. and the WEST COAST, with particular concentrations of percentage per population in urban areas. IMPACT OF HELICOPTER PARENTING ON JOB SEARCHES 5 10 15 20 25 30 30% of recruiters have had a parent submit a resume for their child 25% have been contacted by a parent who feels their child should receive a job Around 33% of millennials say their parents are very involved in their job hunting 15% had a parent complain when their child wasn't hired 12% have had a parent call to schedule an interview for process. their child 10% have had a parent call 7 OUT OF 10 to negotiate their child's salary and benefits recruits say they need to speak to their parents before 4% have seen parents show up accepting a job offer. to interviews with their child HOW HELICOPTER PARENTING AFFECTS KIDS In 2013, 95% of college counselling centers reported that the number of students with significant psychological problems is a growing concern on their campus. COUNSELOR 70% reported that the number of students with psychological problems had increased in the past year. Nearly 25% of student counselling center clients were reported to be on psychotropic drugs. OUT OF 100,000 COLLEGE STUDENTS, STUDIES FOUND THAT: 84% felt OVERWHELMED by responsibilities 60.5% felt very SAD 57% felt very LONLEY 51.3% felt overwhelming ANXIETY 4% had seriously considered SUICIDE GIRLS ARE TYPICALLY "HELICOPTERED" MORE THAN BOYS One study found that 13% OF FEMALE participants had helicopter parents, compared to only 5% OF MALES, with mothers being the principal hovering parents. 86% of first year college students reported being in frequent contact with their mothers... .while 71% communicated frequently with their fathers. LASTING ISSUES Helicopter parenting has been associated with “problematic development in emerging adulthood...by limiting opportunities for emerging adults to practice and develop important skills needed for becoming self-reliant adults." A 2014 study found College students with helicopter parents self-report significantly higher levels of DEPRESSION and less Emerging adults don't have the ability to determine for a correlation between highly structured themselves which childhoods and a goal-directed actions to carry out. lack of executive satisfaction in life. function capabilities. Millennials are now Helicopter parenting is associated with low self-worth and an the most protected and programmed generation in history who talk to their increased tendency to engage in risky behaviors such as SMOKING AND parents 8.8 times per week on average. BINGE DRINKING. Luckily, the potentially detrimental effects of helicopter parenting can be addressed when families develop connected autonomy. With connected autonomy, family members undergo a developmental transformation and develop clear, communicated and effective boundaries. Together, these boundaries allow family members to be available for emotional and material support, while also honoring the occasional need for separation during this transition. SIGNS OF HELICOPTER PARENTING INABILITY TO LET GO A helicopter parent feels considerable emotional pain when they are out of their child's presence. They may be unable to focus on other activities while a child is at school or elsewhere. SPOILING CHILDREN Wanting the best for your child may sometimes take the form of simply giving it to them, leading to a cycle of spoiling which may affect the child for years to come. LOBBYING Rather than letting children make and learn from mistakes, helicopter parents may step in to defend their child regardless of the situation. For example, helicopter parents have been known to call teachers, bosses, or other authority figures to speak on behalf of their child. BEING A SECURITY GUARD Not allowing children to engage in certain forms of play, not allowing them work their own way out of situations with other children, or helping your child to avoid conflict altogether are clear signs of helicopter parenting. HELPING TOO MUCH WITH HOMEWORK Occasional homework help is necessary as a parent, but too much help or doing your child's homework altogether is often a sign of helicopter parenting. GERMAPHOBIA A less common sign of helicopter parenting is a tendency to avoid germs and bacteria more than normal.Not allowing children to do particular play activities because of concerns about illness may be a sign of helicopter parenting. WATCHDOGGING Keeping tabs on kids at all times, whether in person or electronically, while never allowing them to be somewhere that you are not is a sign of helicopter parenting. TOO MANY EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES Helicopter parents will often overschedule their children's lives in an effort to ensure that they have the fullest possible experience of childhood. Often this is for their transcripts to be appealing to colleges. TOO MUCH PRAISE Many helicopter parents believe that their children should never have to experience the feeling of failure and will pile on too much praise. This can potentially breed poor performance and narcissism later in life. YELLOWBIICK FIND YOUR WAY HOME grinnell.edu | Confessions of a Helicopter Parent en.wikipedia.org | Helicopter Parent abcnews.go.com | Helicopter Parents Hover Over Kids' Lives slate.com | Kids of Helicopter Parents are Sputtering Out businessinsider.com | Helicopter Parents Ruin Childhood healthresearchfunding.org | 8 Provocative Helicopter Parents Statistics forbes.com 5 Reasons Why Helicopter Parents Are Sabotaging Their Child's Career apa.org | College Students' Mental Health is a Growing Concern, Survey Finds acha-ncha.org | Reference Group Exectuve Summary Spring 2014 cnn.com | Hovering Parents Need to Step Back at College Time livescience.com | 'Helicopter' Parents Have Neurotic Kids, Study Suggests link.springer.com | Helping or Hovering? The Effects of Helicopter Parenting on College Students' Well-Being dailymail.co.uk | Children With Controlling 'Helicopter Parents' Are More Likely to be Depressed colorado.edu | Kids Whose Time is Less Structured Are Better Able to Meet Their Own Goals law.uh.edu | Hovering Too Close: The Ramification of Helicopter Parenting In Higher Education education.com | Are You a Helicopter Parent? 10 Telltale Signs people.howstuffworks.com | 5 Signs of Overparenting