The Sobriety Spectrum

The Sobriety Spectiful How your level of intoxication affects: Stone Cold Sober Nicely Buzzed Smashingly Drunk Interactions with the Too shy to even try Hitting on everything in eye- shot, including the furniture Ready to flirt and have fun opposite sex Interactions with the It's chill. Bromances and BFF's! Let's brawl, y'all! same sex Lifting heavy things Bend at the knees, not at Giye me a hand and let's set up Grawwr! I bet I can throw this the back this flatscreen on the front lawn keg through that window.!! Playing darts I suck at this game! I rule at this game! I'm so sorry! I'll pay for the damages - and your girlfriend's stitches A nasally rendition of "New York , New York" Karaoke "Sweet Caroline" time! IWILL F'ING SURVIVE, bah-bah-bah!! MOTHER F'ERS!!!! Hanging out with your spouse Did you remember the dry cleaning? Why do you always say that about my mother?! Mmmm...*giggle* o0oh... remember our honeymoon? Interactions with I'll email you those figures right after we finish up here I could totally do your job - hell, teach a monkey to kiss an ass and it could, too! No seriously, it barely hurt, your boss Want to see it? Talking politics Let's agree to disagree... You know I'm right because FOX NEWS can suck my left I'M TALKING LOUDER THANYOU. one, you c-sucking Nazi! What the hell - just put it somewhere I can hide it Seriously, dude - just like the one Tyson has, but BIGGER! Getting a tattoo Forever is a really long time... Amazon.com I've always wanted The Wire boxed set. Ima one-click this M-F'er! I DESERVE a 3-D TV! Now lemme just grab the good credit card outta wifey's purse... I'll wait for it to hit "Deal of the Day" ROTHENS www.beerandwhiskeybros.com BEER ERS