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Zombie SEO, Techniques that will Kill your Rankings

E ZOMBIE SEO BEOLECHNIQUES THAT WILL KILL YOUR RANKINGS! As I'm sure you know, there are zombies everywhere, just waiting to attack. Some may have infiltrated your SEO Company. Be sure to protect yourself against these SEO techniques that have been dead for years. Trust us, they will suck the life right out of your website. KEYWORD STUFFING It's a well known fact that zombies gorge on human brains. A little known fact is that they also are involved in keyword gorging or keyword stuffing, which is a SEO technique that involves overloading keywords onto a Web page so that search engines will read the page as being relevant to a specific Web search. NEVER TRUST A ZOMBIE! PORTAL PAGES How do you think zombies got here? A portal of the living dead, of course. How do you think people get better rankings? Portal Pages! Portal Pages are used to manipulate search engine rankings deliberately. These pages are usually stuffed with keywords, and are created for the sole purpose of being crawled by search engine crawlers so that they rank well for these keywords in the SERPS. I don't know about you, but I think I'll be keeping my distance from each of these portals. 97% OF PEOPLE WHO WONDER T00 CLOSE TO THE PORTALS VANISH UNRELATED KEYWORDS LOAKING Zombies are full of trickery, in their personal life and in their SEO expeditions. Cloaking is showing Have you ever heard a conversation amongst zombies? It's like they are speaking another language. Some SEO companies implement this same strategy using irrelevant keywords in order to rank for them, and get traffic from unrelated/irrelevant keywords. Google does not have gibberish as a language selection, so why would you trust them with your keywords? different content to the search engine spiders as opposed to human traffic. In other words, spiders see a website and all its content while visitors see a specific page. Just like Harry Potter, Zombies also utilize their cloaks. OFFICAL LANGUAGE : GIBBERISH ZOMBIES V HARRY POTTER PAGE SWAPPING Trading is the name of the game. Zombies specialize in haggling and trading goods and services. That's why Zombie SEOS are so good at page swapping. Page swapping is a process replaces a web page that has a high ranking in the search engines with a low ranking page to optimize this low ranked web page. Never trust a haggler, you'll get burned. 10 OUT OF 10 TIMES ZOMBIES ARE LYING HTDDEN TEXT Zombies have one thing in common with Iguanas, THEY BLEND IN. This is VERY similar to the hidden text strategy they use to trick Google. Hidden text is content which your visitors cannot see, but which is still readable by the search engines. The idea is to load a Web page with keywords and keyword phrases that would be unsightly to visitors but that would improve the page's rankings in the search engine results, and to do so without letting your visitors see the text. Who are we kidding, you don't want to trick Google, that is not a good idea even for a Zombie. SHAPE SHIFTERS INK FARMS This comes into relevancy during the "dry season. The dry season for zombies lasts from November-March, when the humans stay inside. Just as dry seasons affect zombies, they also affect SEO companies that rely on shady link farms for their clients. A link farm is a website (or a group of websites) created only for the purpose of increasing the link popularity of another site by increasing the number of incoming links. Given the intelligence level of zombies, I'm not sure I would trust their farming skills or techniques. AVERAGE ZOMBIE IQ 37.25920 DUPLICATE CONTENT There are over 100,000 twin zombies roaming the earth, you may run into the same but different zombie many times, it can be very confusing which is the goal. Some SEO companies use the same technique, which is duplicating content that appears on the Internet in more than one place. When there are multiple pieces of identical content on the Internet, it is difficult for search engines to decide which version is more relevant to a given search query. Don't be fooled, duplicate content is very common, and very dangerous to your site. Keep your eyes peeled. 200 REPORTED CASES OF SIAMESE TWINS DID YOU KNOW? ZOMBIES SPEND 13 HOURS A DAY ON SOCIAL NETWORKS SOCIAL NETWORKING SPAM SUZIE BRAIN EATER DEAD HEAD, CA Zombies are social creatures, and love to network. Social networking is fine, as long as you don't use it for evil. This is an approach they use in black hat SEO they target demographics on social networking sites and message people with advertisements. And no one appreciates that! ANYBODY IN THE MARET FOR A BLONDE? #HAGGLEPROBS CATCH OF THE DAY LIVE BY THE BRAIN #ENDOFDRYSEASON DIE BY THE BRAIN TWITTER IS MOST USED NETWORK ITS THE DRY SEASON #HUNGERPROBS CYBERSQUATTING Zombies are very specific about the kind of brains they eat, there have been reported cases of them keeping a human even though it is not their preferred brain, and trading it at an elevated price to another zombie. Some companies have also been known to do this with domains. It's called cybersquatting. Cybersquatting is registering, selling or using a domain name with the intent. of profiting from the goodwill of someone else's trademark. HIGHEST REPORTED SALE OF A HUMAN BRAIN 1839.698 RIP ZOMBIE SEO COPYRIGHT 2013 RANKPOP.COM

Zombie SEO, Techniques that will Kill your Rankings

shared by RankPop on Oct 04
SEO can be uncertain ground for those who choose to employ techniques that can really damage their own SEO efforts. Often these poisonous techniques are used with the end goal of higher rankings in m...



Megan Heck


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