
Why Student Affairs Professionals will survive the Zombie Apocalypse
Why Student Affairs Professionals will survive the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE Essential when stuck in a room full of the undead SA PROS top survival skills They are always ready for an emergency, with a first aid kit, flashlight, bottled documents* water Running on al cylinders with almost no sleep is just a normal day-at work Emergency planning should be referenced for campus closure protocols SA Pros have closets full of snacks and candy which will be essential when all food They are experienced at telling the undead student from the ones who are just very tired stores are empty Because they can't have pets, SA Pros have plenty of plants to fight off the zombie hordes V Unkempt appearance V Pale face V Bloodshot eyes V Stumbling down the hallway V Incoherent sentences fo & in some extreme cases, moaning V Ingesting large amounts of unhealthy Tired Student food V Unkempt appearance V Pale face V Bloodshot eyes V Stumbling down the hallway V Moaning V Ingesting large amounts of other people's brains Undead Student They've got the ke s to access isolated spaces on campus & to the college golf cart for a They know how to do quick getaway a lot a little with Very helpful when weapons are scarce to get news quickly & spread In dealing with recent outbreaks of HIN1 & Norovirus on campus, they know how to identify and respond to symptoms of illness. communication to others effectively STOP THE SPREAD OF ZBSD* SA Pros have been dealing with student zombies for "ZBSD, aka zombie behavior spectrum disorder Infections spread easily. Always cover your nose and mouth when killing or maiming a ZBSD victim years, every Fri & Sat night after 2am Germs can live for several hours on weapons Dispose of used axes, knifes, etc. immediately after use. Blood on your hands can transfer to any surface. Wash hands often with soap and water. Seek medical attention immediately if you have ZBSD symptoms. They're versed in longterm planning. They understand the value of a Goal #1: Don t get bitten Goal #2: Stay alive Goal #3: Flee zombie teachable moment such as when a student must be infested left behind if they can't keep up areas killing zombies is just one more 'other duty as assigned WARNING FOR STUDENT AFFAIRS PROS • In dealing with a students stricken with Zombie Behavior Spectrum Disorder (ZBSD*) DO NOT ATTEMPT to "meet them where they are. • Don't be fooled into thinking you can retain a ZBSD victim as a human. Once they are Zombies, they are gone for good. • It is not your responsibility to check students' symptoms. Just like with HINI, they can be diagnosed over the phone, via webcam, and frơm afar...very far. *ZBSD reference from the unofficial Emergency Planning Document, UF Disaster Preparedness Simulation Exercise Infographic created by the Student Affairs professional formerly known as @jesslaulk Graphic Credits: Flashlight by Mark A. Hicks, Candy from Clipartheaven.com. Pea shooter from Bryan Lopez. Tired Student from Iphotos.com . Undead student & party zombies from JessFaulk, Key from Freepik.com, Golf Cart from Muddy Waters Metal Art . Microphone from WorldPolicy.org . Zombie Twitter Sticker from coolpics.blogspot.com . HINI sign from safetysign.com . Brain by BestVector & ZBSD reference by UF staff member Social Media SA pros use They think outside the Feel free to reuse HIN1 signs to save time! Ход
Why Student Affairs Professionals will survive the Zombie Apocalypse
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