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An Updated Guide to the 2012 GOP Presidential Hopefuls

AN UPDATED GUIDE TO THE 2012 GOP PRESIDENTIAL HOPEFULS * Looks like an actor playing a President in a movie. * The leader of the field so far. Until he accidentally calls Bachmann "a crazy bitch" during a debate, has this thing wrapped up. * Has really nice hair. * Probably uses Pantene or something. With conditioner. * Not like a two-in-one or anything. The real deal. MITT ROMNEY * Governor of Texas. * Prone to saying things like “herp" and “derp" during debates in lieu of discussing issues. * Similar to Chuck Norris, in that the legend of his machismo grows by the day and nobody knows why we're still talking about him. * Not Mitt Romney. RICK PERRY * Possibly a cyborg built and controlled by Sarah Palin. * As she was built by Palin, she has a tendency to make incorrect statements and then stare blankly at you as if to prove they were facts. * Not Mitt Romney. MICHELE BACHMANN * Founder of Godfather's Pizza, which makes pizza that looks like this: HERMAN CAIN * As you can see, he has ruined pizza and cannot be trusted to run our country. * Has gained steam in the race by being someone who's not Rick Perry or Michele Bachmann. * Also, not Mitt Romney. * Wait, he's still here? Good for you, Newt. NEWT GINGRICH * No clue. * Is a guy? * Has hair? * Might actually be Mitt Romney. JON HUNTSMAN * Just kidding! * Or we are? * We are. * But are we? * We might be. * But we might not be?!? * May have eaten Mitt Romney. CHRIS CHRISTIE funny OR DiE

An Updated Guide to the 2012 GOP Presidential Hopefuls

shared by rmmojado on Jan 31
We totally forgot about Ron Paul and Rick Santorum. But don't worry, in two weeks you will, too.


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