Drummer Jokes

DRUMMER JOKES The best, the worst, and the comebacks... THE TOP 10 DRUMMER JOKES I. What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians? A drummer. 2 Did you hear about the drummer who went to college? Me neither. 3 What do you call a beautiful women on a drummer's arm? A tattoo. 4 What's the different between a drummer & a vacuum cleaner? You have to plug a vacuum in for it to suck. 5 How do you tell if a stage is level? Drool comes out of both sides of the drummers mouth. 6 How can you tell a drummer's at the door? The knocking increases in speed. 7 What do Ginger Baker and black coffee have in common? They both suck without Cream. 8 What does a sneeze and a drum solo have in common? You know it's coming & you can't stop it. 9 How do you get a drummer off your porch? Pay him 10 bucks for the pizza. What's the difference between a drum machine & a 10. drummer? You only have to punch information into a drum machine once for it to understand you. THE ANATOMY OF DRUMMER JOKES Step I. Pick a drummer stereotype Stupid Man-whore No rhythm Step 2. Pick an object to compare a drummer with Step 3. Decide why this object is superior to drummers Step 4. Explain to your drummer why he or she is inferior to your chosen obejct. Step 5. ..Find a new drummer THE TOP 5 DRUMMER COMEBACKS I. Why are drummer jokes so simple? So that bassists can understand them. 2. How do you know when a singer's at the door? 'Cos they never know when to come in. 3. How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, but the guitarist has to show them how to do it first. 4. What do you call an in-tune bassist? An oxymoron. 5. What's the difference between an electric guitar and and onion? Noone cries when you cut up an electric guitar. THE Infographic created by www.themusiciansguide.co.uk MUSICIAN'S GUIDE