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007 Licence to Drive

007 LICENCE TO DRIVE To celebrate the release of "Skyfall" and the reintroduction of Q' to the franchise, we take a look at some of Bond's most memorable cars and their crashes and speculate as to how the unforgettable Desmond Llewelyn might have reacted to them using our unique "Q Rating System". Q RATING SYSTEM Pay attention 007, here's how this works 95 НАРPY AS LARRY MILDLY ΑΝΟΥΕD NOT FUSSED CONFUSED FULLY MIFFED AMBIVALENT CHEESED OFF TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: GOLDFINGER YEAR: 1964 FNR VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN DB5 DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: TOTAL WRECK SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: Having used the driver door as a shield from enemy gunfire (during which several bullets impacted and destroyed interior façade) 007 proceeded to be held under duress in the vehicle until he used the passenger ejector seat to dispose of his captor. Reckless driving from 007 ensued, resulting in a total loss of vehicle Sean Connery control and the car was written off after colliding head-on with a concrete wall. Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "I'm stunned frankly. I was under the impression that 007 not only had a licence to kill, but also a licence to drive. We'll chalk this one up to experience and I hope CHEESED OFF ! for more care to be taken with the next vehicle". TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: THUNDERBALL YEAR: 1965 VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN DB5 FMP 7B DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: NONE SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: 007 did not cause any damage to his Aston Martin during this operation, despite being pursued by the enemy. Q-branch wil1 be most pleased. Sean Connery Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "Well done O07! was a little hesitant to must say that give you the keys to your replacement DB5 in light of what happened to the last one, however you have conducted yourself with true British decorum and spared me from filling in any insurance paperwork". НАРPY AS LARRY HOHIOUE TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: LIVE AND LET DIE YEAR: 1973 VEHICLE: AEC REGENT III DOUBLE-DECKER BUS DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: : SIGNIFICANT DAMAGE SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: After commandeering a public double decker bus, 007 proceeded to cause major wear to the tyres by performing a 180 degree U-turn in the middle of a road causing significant damage to several local authority vehicles, namely police motorcycles and cars which swerved to avoid the oncoming bus. Minutes later, Bond made a wrong turn onto a road with a low clearance bridge and instead of Roger Moore stopping and proceeding on foot, drove the bus under the bridge causing the entire top deck to be smashed from the vehicle and to land on top of a pursuing police car. 2) Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "Whilst I am not too bothered with this circumstance owing to the fact that this was not a vehicle issued by Q-branch, I have a minor issue which comes from the NOT FUSSED fact that you displayed a flagrant disregard for a noble means of public transport. You are aware that I often use the bus to get to and from MI6 and quite often sit on the top deck? Food for thought 00r". TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: THE SPY WHO LOVED ME YEAR: 1977 VEHICLE: LOTUS ESPRIT DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: SLIGHT DAMAGE SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: After a high speed escape from an attack helicopter, 007 utilised the dual functionality of the Lotus Esprit by * 2nsur Moone driving it headlong off of a pier into the ocean engaging the vehicles submarine capabilities and launching a roof mounted missile to dispatch of the hovering aircraft. From this point, Bond and his Russian KGB counterpart, Triple X', engaged sub-marine enemies using the vehicles many gadgets. The vehicle escaped largely undamaged; however a leak did spring when the car was hit by the shockwave of an underwater explosion. Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "I have no quarrel with the way that you handled the situation and the vehicle 007, I am more disappointed in the build quality of the vehicle. A submarine which MILDLY leaks as a result of an indirect hit is not a success in my books". ΑΝΝΟΥED TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: FOR YOUR EYES ONLY YEAR: 1981 VEHICLE: LOTUS ESPRIT DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: TOTAL WRECK SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: The vehicle had been fitted with a new anti-burglar system by Q-branch, which was deployed following an attempt to break into the car by an unknown assailant. Roger Moore The car promptly exploded causing damage to surrounding flora and fauna and fatally injuring the assailant. (4) Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "My apologies are due here 007, when I designed the anti-burglar system I was trying to make a bold statement to the enemy that property of MI6 is not to be trifled with however, I overlooked the fact that you would need the vehicle following on from any attempts to break into it. Back to the drawing board". CONFUSED TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS YEAR: 1987 VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN VOLANTE O B549 VUU DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: TOTAL WRECK SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: Whilst escaping from local authorities and Soviet forces in Bratislava, 007 used the vehicles arsenal of gadgets to outwit and outrun the enemy. The laser cutting system in the as did Timothy Dalton hubcaps proved the retractable ski and rocket propulsion system. successful in its first field trial 007 employed the car became stuck in a snow drift on the side of a the vehicles self-destruct mechanism after hill, resulting in a total loss of the vehicle but buying the agent valuable time to escape in an improvised ski slalom on board a cello case belonging to Ms Milovy. Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: “I am thoroughly conflicted in how to feel in this situation 007. Whilst I am ecstatic that most of the gadgets installed by Q-branch were employed during your escape, I am annoyed that you had to destroy the vehicle. I have a suspicion that you may have a penchant for destroying any Aston Martin that you lay your hands on. Be more careful next time 007". AMBIVALENT TOP SECRET AVIS AUTOVER RENTAC OPERATION NAME: TOMORROW NEVER DIES YEAR: 1997 VEHICLE: BMW 7501L DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: TOTAL WRECK SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: Whilst on a reconnaissance mission to infiltrate Elliot Carver's media empire 007 engaged in a high speed escape from a multi-storey car park facility in Germany. The vehicle's many gadgets came into use including the remote controlled driving system in 007's mobile phone, re-inflating tyres, retractable chain cutter, bullet proof Pierce Brosnan glass, roof mounted rocket launchers, and metal spike dispenser. The car was ultimately destroyed when 007 exited the vehicle and remotely drove it off of the top of the car park and through the roof of a shop located directly opposite. Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "If you'll recall 007 I do believe I warned you that there would be severe repercussions if you did not return my in, and I quote "pristine condition". Quite why vehicle FULLY MIFFED felt the need to ascend the car park rather than to you find or even create a suitable exit at ground level is beyond me. M will be hearing from me, and you should count yourself lucky that I am not authorised to withhold technology from you, otherwise the only gadget you'd be receiving for your next mission would be a toothbrush with a slightly pointy tip". TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: DIE ANOTHER DAY YEAR: 2002 VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN vi2 VANQUISH DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: SIGNIFICANT SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: Whilst being pursued by Zao; a henchman of Gustav Graves, 007 used the adaptive camouflage system to great effect several times to avoid detection by the enemy. The car was struck by an enemy missile and flipped onto its roof, causing 007 to display quick thinking and innovation by using the passenger ejector seat to right the vehicle. The car sustained damage whilst in the line of enemy fire, and 007 himself used a high impulse localised charge to blow out the front windshield in order to rescue NSA agent 'Jinx' Johnson. Pierce Brosnan Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "I realise now that you most likely have a problem with Aston Martins on a pathological level 007 which must be why you continue to inflict significant damage to vehicles issued to you by Q-branch. I would kindly ask that you seek some form of medical counsel in order to stamp out the root of this fascination with wrecking MILDLY ΑΝΝΟΥED such beautiful cars in the line of duty". TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: CASINO ROYALE YEAR: 2006 VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN DBS V12 DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: TOTAL WRECK SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: Dawel Crang Whilst pursuing the terrorist financier known as Le Chiffre, 007 lost control of his vehicle after swerving to avoid hitting HM treasury agent Vesper Lynd who had been kidnapped, tied up and laid in the middle of the road as a trap. Please note that 007 was driving over the local speed limits and driving conditions were wet. Q RATING SYSTEM Q-DE-BRIEF: "I realise that I did not issue you with your vehicle on this occasion 007, however you know full well that this assignment and this vehicle were assigned to you directly by M, our superior. Your total disregard for the speed limit, especially in wet and dark conditions, proved near-fatal when you had to swerve to avoid Ms Lynd. I am recommending that you re-sit your driving theory test in a bid to emphasise the importance of both foreign and domestic highway codes". CHEESED OFF TOP SECRET OPERATION NAME: QUANTUM OF SOLACE YEAR: 2008 VEHICLE: ASTON MARTIN DBS V12 DAMAGE TO VEHICLE: SIGNIFICANT SUMMARY OF INCIDENT: 007 became involved in a high speed chase in a tunnel during which his vehicle was subjected to heavy gunfire. The driver door was also ripped from the vehicle after a Danel Craig being impaled by a civilian lorry. The chase culminated in more heavy gunfire and shunting from an enemy vehicle whilst driving through a quarry in the outskirts of Sienna, Italy. 007's vehicle remained drivable after the encounter. Q RATING SYSTEM 3) Q-DE-BRIEF: "Whilst you have obviously taken some steps towards MILDLY ΑΝΝΟΥD facing your Aston Martin destroying demon, you have not fully conquered it. I suggest further measures be taken to deal with this 007, as we do not have a limitless supply of Aston Martins to feed your destructive addiction". www.NATIONWIDEVEHICLECONTRACTS.CO.UK n TIONWIDE vehicle contracts INFOGRAPHIC BY FRESH EGG wwW.FRESHEGG.COM

007 Licence to Drive

shared by southcoastdavid on Nov 20
To celebrate the release of Skyfall and the reintroduction of the "Q" franchise, this infographic looks at some of Bond's most memorable cars and their crashes, plus speculates as to how the unforgett...


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