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The Social Sickness

THE SOCIAL SICKNESS DO YOU HAVE AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH SOCIAL MEDIA? Do you check your phone every 2 minutes to see how many likes your Instagram photo has? Do your Tweets contain zero vowels? Are you the mayor of a dozen establishments? Your answer to these questions will determine whether or not you #R #R belong in the social media infirmary or not. Read on to learn about the social media habits that lead to a severe social sickness and massive decrease in productivity. I need to Reddit about this line after I upload these pics to Tumblr. pics. GURU PATIENT THE SOCIAL GURU PATIENT PATIENT: THE ALERT-LOVER THE VERB CREATOR ... You set your phone to receive audible alerts whenever anything happens. You have proclaimed yourself a “Social Media Guru" on your You turn social media sites into verbs. business card. Every time your mobile phone buzzes, beeps, and barks when someone retweets, shares, or comments on something of yours, you actively sabotage your own ability to focus on the important tasks at hand. Everyone is a social media guru these days. You might as well just title yourself “Human Being" and call it a day. Upon using the phrases "I need to Instagram that" and "I'm gonna Reddit the hell out of this," all of your "friends" simultaneously put their head in their hands. Additionally, you lose nearly all the social cred you've worked so hard for. +3 +6 +15 THE SELF-PROCLAIMED INFLUENCER PATIENT: PATIENT: THE VOWEL HATER PATIENT "THE BLOG REFERENCER You drop every possible vowel from your Tweets because you are intent on making the most of the 140 characters provided. You answer most questions with "You should read my blog post about that." You regularly check your level of "influence" on every social-scoring site available. Not only have you thrown grammar and common decency out the window, your unacceptable spelling habíts have also crept into your emails and blog posts. Because you are essentially telling people to “look it up,' they will become extremely frustrated that you aren't just answering their question. A true influencer is concerned about providing useful content for others. The more time you spend checking your influence, the less influence you'll have. VERY NICE! PATIENTI THE LIKER PATTHE CONSTANT CHECKER PATIENT THE MULTI-MAYOR •.. You take the time to check in at locations as you drive by. Because of this, you are Mayor, Duke, and King of at least 10 establishments. You turn on your phone every 2 minutes, with no regard for m your location or present company, to check how your Instagram, status update, or Tweet is being received. You use the "like" button instead of posting a quick comment. With all the discipline and energy you spend checking in to your local coffee shop, burrito joint, and pilates class, you don't have the mental capacíty to do the things that will really help you get ahead in life. Because you only “liked" the photo of your friend's newborn, your friendship is now under scrutiny. A simple “she's beautiful!" would have taken a mere 2 seconds more and would have carried much Your friends can't stand dining with you, and you've already paid "the man" $500 for texting while driving. more weight. DOCTOR WILL BRB #LUNCH PATIENT THE FREAK OUT-ER II You freak out when a social site goes down. Chances are high that the site problems had little or no negative impact on you or your career whatsoever. However, your anxiety and rage probably took a few hours off your life. Created by FIVE Marketo COLUMN SOURCES:ROHITBHARGAVA.COM SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM НАВIT SYMPTOM НАBIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT SYMPTOM HABIT

The Social Sickness

shared by Marketo on Oct 11
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Our infographic takes a fun look at all the frightening social media habits that lead to severe social sickness and a massive decrease in productivity.

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