EVER BEEN LATE FOR WORK?
Well, don't feel too bad. You're in good company.
16% arrive late to work at least once/week according to a 2011 survey.
27% confess to coming through the door behind schedule at least once a month.
Our bosses appear to be even worse. A 2006 report reveals American CEOs don't make it on time to 8 out of ever 10 meetings.
Tardiness costs U.S. businesses more than $3 billion yearly in lost productivity.
The law of averages seems to work against most of us when we're trying to get out of the house and to our place of employment. If something can go wrong, it will.
DELAYS ARE MOST OFTEN CAUSED BY:
8% getting kids to day care or school
19% lack of sleep
9% bad weather
But there's only thing about being late that's usually a given. The look on the boss' face when we finally do get there.
Nothing's going to change that. But here are some excuses that should help change your boss' mood for the better!
WORK HOURS - TIME CARE
DATE TIME IN TIME OUT HOURS
The dog buried my Volvo in the backyard...
Whatever you do, do not download that new "sleep late and be on time for work" app for your smartphone.
I decided to take my experimental solar power scooter to work. It started to rain and let's just say, I won't be filing for a patent anytime soon.
My girlfriend is anti-daylight savings.
Four out of five doctors recommend eight hours of sleep at night. My friends recommend at least six hours of "Call of Duty" a night. You do the math.
I had a severe allergic reaction to 8:00 AM.
7. EXCUSE: I got caught in a temporary cosmic rift and was sucked into a parallel universe for most of the morning.
I got in the elevator with our CEO and the next thing I knew, he'd pushed the buttons for all the floors. What a joker!
Long story short...two kids, one box of Cocoa Puffs, a half gallon of expired milk, projectile vomiting...
I was kidnapped by the two-hour liberation army. After two hours, they let me go.
My three year old came to the conclusion this morning that my car keys were flushable. He was right.
I forgot we had moved locations and went to our old address. Did you know it's a flower shop now? These are for you!
The procrastinators' club was holding its weekly meeting at Starbucks this morning and I got in back of them in line.
My car was hijacked by a bear, making me late. The good news is: I have the number one trending video on YouTube!
We had a "Walking Dead" marathon party last night and my girlfriend made me stay up all night on zombie watch.
My atomic clock was deemed a hazard by the Nuclear Regulatory Commission.
TOTAL HOURS LATE: 57894
EMPLOYEE: JOHN DOE
YOU ARE FIRED!
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